Chuck Norris Stares Down Death in Bismarck, ND…

March 30, 2016

Chuck Norris in Bismarck, ND

Chuck Norris the man, the myth, the legend couldn’t quite walk on water this day! He was know to have swam through land….yet Bismarck, ND winter proved too tough! Ah yes, he had finally met his match in the ol’ buffalo state.

As a child Chuck never had a kickstand on his bike; it was true that any thing this boy kicked never stood.~ Fact.

As a teen whilst explaining the taste of water to his buddies he was told about the wind swept prairies, and how only a true North Dakotan could withstand the climate. Chuck chuckled at this feeling. He was a man among wee thing’s. The thought never could quite escape him (while making power point look weak in school) from that day forward.

As a man Chuck had to make decisions. Like making peace with his own hands because he did not want to find it. Chuck looks for no thing. He had two paths he could take. Heading to Jurassic Park to adopt another pet or meet his so called match in North Dakota.

Bismarck in the dead of winter was the choice. Having never woke a dead winter he thought this would be his first.

Chuck Vs. Nor Dak 

As he steps off the plane it was so cold a rooster rushed by hoping he could find a KFC and beg to use the pressure cooker! This man was not about to back down…No, not the man who had once written the book on how to read.

Fighting his way into the wind towards the baggage claim he wondered what kind of crazies have an outdoor airport in these conditions. Upon entering the door there was a travel agent offering tropical vacations to Prudhoe Bay, AK “buy one night in an igloo get the second half off.”

Back into the elements; Chuck became still, realizing he was in for a fight. This is the man that made stairs move…Yeah! Didn’t you know there is no such thing as an escalator, only stairs that are afraid of him!

Looking for a place to shelter himself, none could be found. In North Dakota it’s so cold when they milk the cows they get ice cream. Oh and the tree’s left in the stone ages and the stones left before dirt became popular. Frantic to find shelter he realized this was the end of the Norris. If it wasn’t for Granny running out in her nightie and carrying him back to the plane, we wouldn’t know of the man who doesn’t do push ups, but instead pushes the world down.